


And it was Not your Fault but Mine

by Jesslovestowrite



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Angelica Has Hanahaki Disease, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Hanahaki Disease, It has a happy ending I swear, John does too, Minor Alexander Hamilton/Angelica Schuyler, Minor Alexander Hamilton/John Laurens, No one dies!, Supportive Angelica Schuyler
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-28
Updated: 2020-07-31
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:02:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25577764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jesslovestowrite/pseuds/Jesslovestowrite
Summary: "Where is Angelica?""I'm afraid she's taken ill. She will not be joining us.""Will she be alright?""One can only hope."----------------------------------------------------------She fell in love with him the minute she looked into his eyes.But it wasn't meant to be.She would do anything for her sister.Suffering in silence without complaint, Angelica watches as Eliza and Alexander grow closer and closer together. And as her relationship with Alexander grows further and further apart.But what happens when the first petal falls?
Relationships: Alexander Hamilton/Angelica Schuyler, Alexander Hamilton/Elizabeth "Eliza" Schuyler, Alexander Hamilton/John Laurens, John Barker Church/Angelica Schuyler, John Laurens/Margaret "Peggy" Schuyler
Comments: 2
Kudos: 35





	1. The Ball

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by @wingedcosplay's duet with @ky.and.co on TikTok! I saw this and instantly got an idea! Here's the video if you want to see it: https://vm.tiktok.com/JY7wnkY/
> 
> (I hope you don't mind that I wrote this!)
> 
> Word count: 1,177

"Oh, Angelica, you are absolutely dreadful! The way you string these poor soldiers along, it's positively fiendish!" Eliza laughed as they watched another soldier walk away after dancing with her older sister.  


"Eliza, you know just as well as I what it is they are after. You know who we are. Our name comes with status and wealth, and all of these 'poor soldiers' know that." Angelica sighed, taking a seat for a moment, exhausted from all the dancing.  


"Still, it isn't right, you know. Toying with their emotions."  


"Maybe so, but it is great fun." Eliza shook her head with another laugh, getting up to grab drinks. Angelica watched as she floated through the crowd before she noticed someone standing beside her. The Continental soldier stood not much taller than her, hair black as soot pulled back into a ponytail to show his eyes, eyes that felt like she was being drawn in against her will, deep brown pools that she couldn't seem to swim in.  


"I'm very sorry to interrupt, but I must say, you strike me as a woman who has never been satisfied." Angelica balked at the boldness of such a statement, immediately finding a way to turn this man down.  


"I do not know what you mean. You forget yourself."  


"You're like me. I'm never satisfied." He rushed to save himself.  


"Is that right?" She asked, curiosity peeking through.  


He grabbed her hand with a slight smirk, leaning forward to kiss the back of her hand. "I've never been satisfied."  


"My name is Angelica Schuyler." She stated with a small curtsey. She couldn't help but notice the look of recognition that crossed his face. It was a look she was all too familiar with.  


"Alexander Hamilton." He said with an arrogant air.  


"Where is your family from?" She watched the arrogance leave his face, if only for a moment before it was quickly replaced.  


"All of that is unimportant. There are a million things I have yet to do. I implore you to wait and see."  


It wasn't long after he walked away that Eliza came back to the table, words rushing out of her mouth in a mile a minute. “Angelica, you'll never guess who I just saw. He was so handsome, dashing, and daring. I want him to be mine.”  


“Oh? And who is this lucky man that you wish to claim as yours?”  


“I'm afraid I do not know his name I only saw him for a few seconds as we crossed paths.”  


“Please come out to me I want to see the man you wish to marry.”  


“He's over there on the stairs.” Angelica’s heart dropped as she realized the man Eliza was talking about was Alexander Hamilton. The man who had stolen her heart so quickly. She kept control of her face as she turned and looked back at Eliza, a smile painting itself on her face. “I don't believe he was one of the soldiers that you danced with - unless you danced while I was away?”  


“Oh, no, none of that! My poor feet are in absolute agony over the last few hours of fun I've been having. I will; however, go and talk to him for you.”  


“Angelica you don't have to! I'm sure I will speak to him eventually.” She's worried Angelica will take him away from her. She couldn't do that even if she tried.  


“What kind of sister would I be, my dear Eliza, if I did not monitor him before he met you and your naive heart?”  


“My heart is not naive, only open.”  


“Yes, open to heartbreak. Don't worry, Eliza, I will not steal him from you. I'll bring him to you.” She said, making her way across the room to Alexander and the soldiers surrounding him.  


“Miss Schuyler, we meet again. To what do I owe this pleasure? Would you care for a dance? I’m afraid I’m not much of a dancer.” He said, the charm falling back into place as soon as he noticed her presence.  


“No, thank you. There's someone I would like for you to meet if you'll come with me.”  


“Where are you taking me?” He asked as the crossed the floor.  


“I'm about to change your life.”  


“Then, by all means, lead the way.”  


“Elizabeth Schuyler, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” Her sister greeted with a curtsey as they approached.  


“Schuyler?” Alexander asked, turning to Angelica with a questioning stare.  


“My sister.” He made a noise of confirmation, turning back to face the younger Schuyler sister.  


“Thank you for all of your service.”  


“If it takes fighting a war for us to meet, it will all have been worth it.” He said, leaning forward to kiss the back of her hand. Angelica could feel the charm rolling off of him in waves, and she could see her sister drink up every word.  


“I’ll leave you to it.” She noticed Alexander’s eyes drift back to her in one last glance before she floated off into the crowd, desperate to get away so her sister couldn’t see her hurting. If she saw that, Eliza would give up on Alexander entirely. He would be hers, but, Eliza would never smile like that again. That’s a cost she could never pay.  


“M’lady, why are you upset?” She quickly collected herself before she turned to face the unfamiliar voice.  


“I’m not. You misunderstand.” She told the young man in front of her. He smiled softly, his freckled cheeks bunching up slightly.  


“I’m sorry to speak out of turn. You merely looked like a woman who lost someone very important to her. But, if you do not wish to speak about it, perhaps we can dance?”  


Angelica thought about it for a moment, before nodding in agreement, taking his outstretched hand. She watched his eyes flit around the room as they danced as if he was looking for someone. “You speak of me looking like a woman lost, and yet you are no different.” She mentions, looking up into his eyes.  


He looked down at her with a smile and a nod. “I suppose that is how I was able to see it in you so clearly, we both have lost someone we loved.”  


“I don’t believe I caught your name before.”  


“I don’t believe I told you. John Laurens, your humble, obedient servant.” He said with a bow.  


“Angelica Schuyler. A pleasure to meet you, Mr. Laurens.” The look of recognition didn’t cross his face.  


“Please, call me John.”  


They parted ways after their dance came to an end, Angelica having almost forgotten of Alexander and Eliza. As the night drew to close, the Schuyler sister’s climbed into their carriage to head home.  


“Thank you for your help, Angelica. I will forever be eternally grateful.” Eliza said as they walked into the house arm in arm.  


“Of course. I’m your sister, I will always be by your side.” But oh, how it would pain her to be at her side and watch them fall in love.


	2. The Letters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angelica's suffering can only go unnoticed for so long.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So! I found three (countem, 1 2 3) letters that did NOT get burned/lost from Alexander to Eliza. And the search for letters continued!
> 
> Snippets of those three letters are spattered around this chapter, as well as a quote from Angelica to Eliza in regards to Hamilton.
> 
> Word count: 1,708

Angelica woke up coughing, head feeling as if it was full of cotton. She forced herself to get up, pushing through the feeling of sickness as she got herself ready for the day, ready for the walk she and her sisters always took through the town. She walked out of her room with her head held high, meeting her sisters at the base of the stairs with a smile on her face. If they noticed anything wrong, they failed to mention it, now did they mention the handkerchief hanging out of her sleeve.  


"Eliza, there's a letter here for you." Their father, Philip, mentioned as they walked through the door. Eliza rushed to open it, not having gotten a letter lately.  


"It's from Alexander!" She exclaimed, holding the letter close to her chest. She ripped it open with excitement, reading it for what seemed like forever. Both Angelica and Peggy peeked over her shoulder, reading the letter as well.  


_"You are certainly a little sorceress and have bewitched me, for you have made me disrelish everything that used to please me, and have rendered me as restless and unsatisfied with all about me, as if I was the inhabitant of another world." _  
__

__Angelica turned, coughing into her handkerchief as they read the letters. As she pulled it away, she couldn't fail to notice the flower bud that sat within the palm of her handkerchief, no matter how hard she tried. She tucked it away before anyone could see it, turning back to look at the letter and listen to Peggy's teasing.  
_ _

__She didn't fail to notice the look of concern on Eliza's face.  
_ _

__As the trio of sisters walked into the foyer to part ways, Peggy for classes, Eliza and Angelica to their respective practices, Angelica stopped Eliza.  
_ _

__"Eliza. Promise me - promise me that you'll be careful with him. I know your heart is open, but you need to guard it well. He will do whatever it takes to survive."  
_ _

__Eliza gave her a look that she couldn't quite read, before she nodded. "I promise."_ _

____

____

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

More and more flower buds have been showing up in her handkerchief as she coughed, accompanied by blood on occasion.  
And more letters have been arriving from Alexander. Eliza has taken to reading them aloud, so as to discourage the peering eyes over he shoulder.  


_"You engross my thoughts too entirely to allow me to think of anything else—you not only employ my mind all day; but you intrude upon my sleep. I meet you in every dream—and when I wake I cannot close my eyes again for ruminating on your sweetness. ‘Tis a pretty story indeed that I am to be thus monopolized, by a little nut-brown maid like you—and from a statesman and a soldier metamorphosed into a puny lover. I believe in my soul you are an enchantress; but I have tried in vain, if not to break, at least, to weaken the charm—you maintain your empire in spite of all my efforts—and after every new one, I make to withdraw myself from my allegiance my partial heart still returns and clings to you with increased attachment. To be honest, my lovely girl, you become dearer to me every moment. I am more and more unhappy and impatient under the hard necessity that keeps me from you, and yet the prospect lengthens as I advance in my duties." _  
__

__Despite the pain Angelica is in, she never tried to let her family know, claiming the cough was nothing but a slight tickle.  
_ _

__"Angelica, you're an absolute fiend! How could you suggest such a thing!?" Eliza laughed as they walked through the town on their daily walks.  
_ _

__"I'm only saying, if you loved me as much as you claim, you would be as generous as the old Romans and lend him to me for a little while." Eliza shrieked out another laugh at her statement, drawing stares from passersby.  
_ _

__"My dear Angelica, you make me laugh as if I wasn't a lady! You must stop, I beg of you." Angelica smiled, silently agreeing to stop her "taunts." Both of the women's smiles fell as the older fell into another horrendous coughing fit, two bloody, blooming flowers appearing in her handkerchief. She tucked them away before Eliza could see, painting a smile on her face at the sight of worry on her sisters. "Are you sure you're alright, Angelica? Perhaps you should see a doctor."  
_ _

__Angelica shook her head lightly, putting a hand on her sister's arm. "It is nothing more than a seasonal cough, I'll be fine as I become accustomed to the change of the seasons." Eliza didn't appear to be convinced, but didn't push any further._ _

__  
_ _

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Alexander!" Eliza exclaimed, speeding down the stairs at the sight of her suitor.  


"Betsey!" He replied, hugging her tightly.  


"What are you doing here? I was under the impression that you would be at camp another three weeks."  


"I have some requirements to fulfill here in Albany, and I decided to stop by and see my dearest Betsey." He explained, turning to great Philip Schuyler. "And her family, of course." He added with a wink. "Mrs. Schuyler, you look even more stunning than when I last saw you. And Peggy, my, how you've grown in such a short time!" He turned to look for the third sister, confusion on his face. "Where is Angelica?"  


"She has taken to her chambers. I'm afraid she's taken ill. She will not be joining us." Philip explained. Eliza didn't miss the concern cross Alexander's face.  


"Will she be alright?"  


"One can only hope. The doctor tells us it is nothing he has ever seen before."  


"I shall keep her in my thoughts."  


"Thank you." Philip heaved a big sigh, a cleansing burst of air he must have felt he needed. "Alexander, you said you came on business? Is there anything I can help with?"  


A look of remembrance came onto Alexander's face. "Ah, yes, actually. Most of the business I have to attend to is with you."  


"Very well, let us go to my study to discuss these matters."  


Alexander turned back to Eliza with a smile. "I shall return to you as soon as my business is complete." He promised, following her father in the direction of his study.  


"Angelica? Are you awake?" Eliza asked, peeking her head into her older sisters room.  


"Always for you, my dear Eliza. What do you need?" Angelica replied. Eliza entered the rest of the way, her eyes laying upon her sisters form. She looked so small in such a large bed, and the sickness made her look ever smaller.  


"Alexander returned today." Eliza couldn't help but smile.  


"He wasn't to return for another three weeks."  


"He's in Albany on business, so he returned early. He's speaking with father now about some of those matters." She sighed. "I do wish the discussions will end quickly, I should very much like to spend some time with him. Maybe stroll in the gardens…" she trailed off, a dreamy look in her eye.  


Angelica chuckled lightly. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say he's claimed your heart entirely. You best be careful my dear, or else you'll fall in love with him."  


"I do believe I have, Angelica. I can no longer think of anything more than spending my dying days with him." Angelica listened with sadness in her heart, but a smile on her face.  


"If I can tell anything from the look on his face, I can tell you with certainty he dreams of nothing more."  


Eliza smiled, about to say something more when one of the servants knocked on the door, entering upon the request of Angelica. "Ma'am, Mr. Hamilton is looking for you. Saying he'd like to take a little stroll with you." She told the younger Schuyler sister.  


"I'll be down in just a moment, thank you, Bridget." Bridget nodded, and, with a slight curtsey, backed out of the room. Eliza said her farewell to Angelica, with the promise of returning to tell of everything that happened.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alexander seemed nervous as they walked through the garden together. Eliza decided not to mention it.  


Finally, they came to a halt at a gazebo, Eliza sitting for a moment to rest her feet. Alexander placed the floor in front of her for a moment, before turning to face her. "Eliza, I have told you, and I told you truly that I love you too much. I have not a dollar to my name, nor land, nor fame, nor a fleet of troops at my command. All that I have to offer you is my honor, a few college credits, a tolerance for pain, and my top notch brain. All of that will be yours, if you'll have me." At Eliza's exclamation of "yes!", Alexander continued. "Your family brings out a side of me I have not seen in quite a while. Peggy confides me in daily, and Angelica tries to take a bite of me as we go toe-to-toe. But know this," he said, kneeling in front of Eliza, taking her hands. "My love for you will never be in doubt. We can get a place in Harlem, and figure this whole world out together. I must tell you, I've lived without a family since childhood, my father abandoned us when I was younger, my mother passed not long after that. I was as wild as an animal. But, in the delirium of my illness I saw my mother's helpless face, the reality of sings to me every night, I shall never forget. And as long as I am alive, I swear to the Lord of all of Heaven, you'll never feel helpless." He promised with a kiss to her hands.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"He proposed!?"  


"We are to be wed as soon as he can resign!" Eliza proclaimed, dancing around the room with Peggy. She turned to look at Angelica. "I do hope your health has returned by then."  


"I overheard the doctor telling father that I should be able to live as normal in a week, although the cough may still reside. I will do everything in my power to be at your wedding. I will always be by your side."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not entirely sure if updates will be this frequent. (I have never uploaded a chapter so fast before.) But I'll try my best to put it on some kind of schedule.
> 
> I'm also realizing Peggy hasn't "spoken" much yet, dont worry, she will.
> 
> The amount of times I listened to Helpless and opened the lyrics is insane. My FBI agent is probably worried about me.
> 
> Writing like a person from Colonial America is coming to me easier than I planned. ALSO it sounds so poetic! 
> 
> Squeal with me here! https://curiouscat.qa/KPOPMULTI7


	3. The Wedding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the shortest chapter I've written so far. I didn't want to go past the wedding for this chapter, I have plans for what I'm gonna do next.
> 
> After this, I'm kinda on my own until what would be Non-Stop, so yeah
> 
> Word Count: 531

The wedding was beautiful. Simple, even for the social status of the Schuyler sisters. From her position at her side, Angelica could tell that Eliza was positively glowing with love.

And Alexander was no different. 

Angelica kept her coughing at bay throughout the ceremony, falling into a fit not even a moment after it ended. Donning a glass of champagne, she prepared herself for her toast, running over the words in her mind. As she did, she spotted Alexander's best man, John Laurens outside, seeming to be having a coughing fit of his own. Grabbing another flute of champagne, she walked out to him. 

"John? You haven't taken ill, have you?" 

John jumped, throwing something to the ground as he turned to face Angelica. 

She immediately noticed the bloodied cherry blossoms on the ground. 

"Angelica! You look well." He stated, thanking her silently as he took the champagne. 

"I am no more well than you. Have you seen a doctor?" 

John laughed slightly, shaking his head. "Nothing can get past you, m'lady. I saw a medic while in camp, but he found nothing wrong aside from my cough, and deemed me fit to fight. You say you are no more well than I, you have taken the same ailment?" Angelica nodded. "I see. Let us carry with us the hope that this ailment leaves us as hastily as it arrives." They were silent as they walked back into the church, setting down their empty flutes. "Ah, that reminds me. The bridesmaid. Do you, by chance, know her name? She has caught my attention, and I must speak with her." 

"The bridesmaid was my other sister, Margaret. Although, her close companions call her Peggy." 

"Another Schuyler sister? How many of you roam this world?" 

"Only the three, Peggy is the youngest of us. I can introduce her to you, if that is what you wish?" John thought about it for a moment, before nodding. 

"I would be most appreciative." Angelica led him over to her younger sister, introducing the pair. 

"Ladies and gentlemen, it is with my great honor to introduce to you, the maid of honor, Angelica Schuyler!" 

Angelica smiled at the light applause that filled the room, before raising her flute. "A toast, to the bride and groom, from your sister Angelica. We toast to your union, and we hope that with these years to come you will provide, and forever be satisfied." 

A chorus of "here here" flooded the room as everyone toasted to the happy couple. 

The night carried on with laughing, drinking, and dancing, before everyone slowly filled out, retiring home for the night. Angelica watched as John and Peggy grew closer throughout the night, happy in the thought that they would suit each other well. She only coughed off and on, fully bloomed cherry blossoms now appearing in her handkerchief. 

She gave her congratulations to Alexander and Eliza before she left, watching with sad eyes as they walked back to their home. As she arrived home, she collapsed on her bed, the weight of her emotions finally taking it's toll. 

She sobbed until she could sob no more, exhaustion taking over and she finally fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> John met Peggy! Will this be good or bad?

**Author's Note:**

> Should I be starting a new story with 1700 other WIPs? No. Will that stop me? No, absolutely not.


End file.
